I remember one of my assignments senior year of high school was to write an epiphany paper. I don't really remember what mine was about, I know it was very philosophical since graduation was two weeks away at this point. Why I bring this paper up is because now, I am having epiphanies of my own as of late.
I'm 22 years old now, will be 23 in a couple of months. Especially now that I'm entering the "real world," I've been thinking about how I ended up here at this moment and thinking about the kind of person I thought I would be right now. Is my life better than I thought it would be? Worse? In between? Well, let's go through it shall we?
I think the first career I envisioned myself in was working for Disney. When I was 7, I came to Disney for the first time. One thing that really caught my attention was the tour of the Animation Studios at the then-MGM Studios (now Hollywood Studios). Seeing all the animators drawing, I thought, "That's awesome!" I really wanted to be an animator.
Problem was, I couldn't really draw and my attention span was extremely short. So, the animator thing was definitely not going to happen.
The girls I made friends with in elementary school and I decided we wanted to go further. I really wanted to be famous when I was little. First, we wanted to be singers. Then, actors. Hollywood stars, whatever. I even started writing scripts once I got into 5th grade. They weren't good, but they were a start. I wanted to work in Hollywood doing something amazing. I loved to entertain and dreamed of getting the Academy Award for... something.
My friends and I dreamed of being 22 and famous. Rich, with fancy cars and our own planes so we could go to Disney World whenever we wanted.
Well, I'm 22 now. I'm not world-famous, I'm not rich (the exact opposite). I have a somewhat fancy car now but not my own plane. But, I can go to Disney World whenever I want. So that's a win.
After I got my dog, I really wanted to become a veterinarian I saw how they took care of Kahlua after she got really sick and nearly died. But, I also realized they also have the wonderful privilege of euthanize pets. That was not okay with me. After I went to the Florida Keys and swam with dolphins, I really wanted to become a dolphin trainer. Realizing they make nix to no money, I switched it up to marine biologist. But, not being very good at science nor interested changed that quickly.
Now, once high school came, I went back to my entertainment phase. Acting I thought would be my calling but I realized that it was not. I liked being more of a behind-the-scenes girl. I really started writing a lot and dabbling in photography.
Everything changed on June 4, 2007 though. Watching your house burn down does things to you. I became very depressed and independent (in not a good way). I started writing a lot more. I realized that communication was my calling that summer. I wrote an op/ed for my school newspaper that I got a lot of praise for. I did extremely well on the English and Writing portions of my SATs. And AP English writing assignments were a piece of cake. I decided I wanted to go to college for communication (mainly journalism) so I could write more.
Penn State ended up being that school I chose. I eventually realized that journalism wasn't exactly what I wanted, but PR was. I chose PR mainly because the economic downturn wasn't looking too hot for journalists. But, PR was even broader and could lead me in many more directions.
I was even happier with that decision after the Sandusky fallout at the end of 2011. Us students were trying to do our own PR. The image of our school had fallen and we knew it was up to us to bring it back up. And I think we've been pretty successful with that (can't say the same for the administration but it's hard to teach an old dog new tricks). The Sandusky scandal helped me grow up and learn what a true PR girl should be.
So, do you think 7-year old me is happy with the 22-year old me? I'm pretty sure she's happy I'm working at Disney. I think she's also happy I'm single. Probably is wondering why the heck I didn't move to California, why I'm addicted to my phone and what a sorority is. I know she hates that I'm not rich and is wondering why I'm not BFFs with the same people as before.
But when you grow up, things change. You change. I'm a very strong person now because of what I've witnessed and gone through in my life. I have had incredible experiences and I'm thankful for almost every person I've met. Is my life perfect? Heck no; there are things I need to work on.
My future goals are to get a full-time job but definitely stay with Disney. I still need to learn how to scuba and surf. I want to get a dog. I really need to quit coke (the liquid kind). I need to make money. I want to be important enough that I get twitter verified. And I want to be a leader in autism awareness, the fight against pediatric cancer, marriage equality and limiting gun violence. There's so much of my life still to live.
And to tell you the truth, even though I didn't expect myself to be right here, right now, I'm totally okay with where I am and very happy with the person I've become.
